Bastille - Flaws

Moving back to Norwich so early before term was more of a forced decision than one i made on my own. I had a volunteer position set up every Thursday at the MK gallery, my family, didn't have to buy my own food, bills weren't an issue Milton Keynes was midway through summer of culture, and for the first time in a long time i didn't mind being there...but when the phone rang from work, offering me hours back in Norwich, it was an offer i needed, rather than wanted to accept. So leaving behind the gallery, the full stomach, family, boyfriend and the bicycle i had grown so fond of i made my way back to Norwich, to a new house, on my own.

I have, it is no lie, grown very fond of Norwich over the last year i have been living here, but this time i feel i have been thrown in rather reluctantly and alone. I'm in a new house on a new street alone for three weeks now, two weeks which were without internet. I get paid tomorrow, but the money's going straight to my parents who had to lend me my last rent payment and my cupboards are bare.

When i first was told that i was moving back early, my mum made the decision for me, yes i was a bit upset at first, but i decided to be optimistic. I haven't really produced much art over the summer and i thought being back in my uni town would get me started again, i planned to write, read, visit the library and do research, go to music events and really embrace this wonderful city. However as usual my plans didn't turn out quite how i thought. It isn't really very easy to attend music nights alone, you get funny looks and it's awkward, my mind is still failing to produce any ideas of worth and my pencil fails to mark, my poems are depressing and i forgot my guitar and im not even sure what to research.

I turn twenty-one next weekend and i can't help questioning when my life is really going to begin, because right now i'm tired and its just not the insomnia.


On the plus side my house is much nicer than the mouldy house i lived in last year and once my housemates move in i know it'll be amazing. Its just a matter of waiting i guess, we'll see.

Today is Tuesday

In silence sat,
fleeting time,
seconds wasted
hours speant
idle
alone
not laziness
-fatigue
lost days
The price of company a long walk
communication slow and so
she refuses to go.
Another week of meaningless activity
pointless in her solitude
no bread, no milk
no money to spend
an existnace others remain oblivious to,
a vacant house on a busy street
a face staring out of a window
a glimpse soon disregarded.
The constant waiting
with little satisfaction
The sound of lonliness so loud
insomnia
fatigue
tired eyes, tired mind
tangled thoughts, memory or dream
dream i hope
guilt
for what my subconsious imagines
just a dream
my unreality
seems more real
than the last 245 hours.

She Keeps Bees - CageMatch

Mammal Hands - Kandaiki

Norwich based jazz trio

Hopefully i'll get round to seeing them live when i go back to uni

MK Festival Fringe

Over the weekend I was volunteering at the Milton Keynes Festival Fringe, an art based festival around the city. The festival has been on since the 10th July and ends this coming sunday, but it's been great.

I was helping out at the Safe Harbour, Beach Huts. The Festival Fringe placed six Beach Huts, each transformed by a commissioned artist, presenting exhibitions, film, sound and art performances.

Before i started on Sunday however i go to see the Giants Parade which was amazing. Here are some pictures;

Dior Advert

I'm a bit obsessed with the Dior Addict advert atm. And when searching for the song i came across this video of the directors cut. The song is Stereo Total- I love you, ono and it's awesome

Exhibition

 As promised, here are some photos from the exhibition launch at the Buszy, Blank Canvas on Friday.

 So if you're in Milton Keynes over July then go pop in and have a look, work ranges from painting, illustration, digital print, installation and photography.

Persuasion. Jane Austen

I recieved this book as a present from Joe not long ago. Having admired Jane Austen for years, i thought it astonishing to me to realise i'd never actually completed a novel. My admiration came from film and tv adaptations of her work, which to me is deemed an insult to her writing. So i have decided to read her novels. Persuasion was an odd one to start with being one of her less famous novels, and the last of her completed novels. However it seemed fitting as it is perhaps the only one i haven't seen a film adaptation of.

I think i may have found my new favourite novel, i definatley recommend.

Poem...because i'm creative like that

Once i ate a ladybug and it made me feel quite ill,
then i ate a centipede and it gave me quite a thrill,
but when i ate a spider it was out to kill,
built a wed around my trachea
so now my voice sounds shrill.

I'll remember in the future
which bugs are tastiest
... which ones will make my stomach ache
and which will make me itch.

I'll try to avoid the eight legged ones
the dotty ones and the green
and offer me a hairy fly
and i'll think you obscene.

I recommend the dragonfly
definitely try the worm
just be careful to cook it through
or else you'll feel it squirm.

They're slimy and delicious
So give these bugs a try
They can be cooked in any way
Boil, pouch, roast or fry.

Poem By Roisin Callaghan
24/04/2012

Clown

Last night around half past eleven i got a message of a friend who runs a gallery space in milton keynes. An artist had dropped out of this months group exhibition and he needed some work to fill the space. Having been working mostly with performance and sound this year and had very little wall based work, which was what he wanted. So i choose my favourite piece i'd done this year and offered it, however the space required at least another painting to fill, and he needed it by Thursday. So i set myself to do a painting, from scratch to go alongside the one i'd already done...and i successfully completed it with time to spare, which just shows i can work pretty solidly when i put my mind to it.


These will be displayed at the Buszy, Blank Canvas in this months exhibition. They're both of me with my face painted in clown make up...i like me as a clown.

Original painting. (Acrylic on fruit crate)

New painting (Acrylic on old screen) This should be landscape not portrait, i just couldn't manage to rotate it.

I'll hopefully have some photos up of the exhibition up soon.

Rambling

My last post was a bit of a downere, admittedly since getting back from america i've been stuck in a rut. Mainly money issues, jobless, boredom, lack of motivation and inspiration.

I feel as though i'm rising out of it though, and hopefully soon i shall be back to my usual self, with too many ideas rather than none at all.

I had an idea whilst walking last night. I don't know if much potential lies in the idea, but i had an idea, something which has been rare to me recently.
I want to record silence, and then play it back at a higher volume. Not so that it becomes static. I just want to emphasise the noises in silence-because silence doesn't exist and thats the beauty of it.

My favourite time of day is dusk, just before the sun reaches its complete setting point, when the street lights switch on -there's a stillness, if just for a moment as though the world is listening, and you can hear the earth breath. It is likely that certain environments provoke this whilst in others it would be none existant, and you yourself in that moment must be in the state of mind to experience it, it's peaceful.

This is something i can't attempt to portray through art. I fear that i may ruin the moment by trying to capture it. You can only tell the world to listen, you can't force them to practice the art of listening, you can't expect then to listen-just like you can't expect them to understand. And that leads to question, what is the actual point of it all, must there be a point. Does there have to be an answer? sometimes it's nicer not knowing, somethings are better left alone, because the mystery is more thrilling that the assumed satisfaction of knowing. and the thing is...i don't know.
Maybe i'm trying to force something, something which is a lot simpler than i'm making it out to be. Simplicity can often be more complex than we first assume.

I don't know. I don't know what?

I'm bored

i'm bored

im bored of milton keynes

i'm bored of art

i'm bored of being average

i'm bored of money

i'm bored of not having any

i'm bored of my hair

i'm bored of ciara being better than me

i'm bored of my songs

i'm bored of my paintings

i'm bored of restrictions

i'm bored of expectations

i'm bored of mess

i'm bored of not being able to sew

i'm bored of my language limitations

i'm bored of my imagination

i'm bored of my reality

i'm bored of my street

i'm bored of carpets

i'm bored of screaming inside

i'm bored of being emotionally impaired

i'm bored by my inabilitys

i'm bored of time

New York

Having been back from America for over a week now i though it was about time i posted about it.

New York is amazing, there's so much to do there, although not being 21 for another 2 months left me pretty limited in the evenings. Two days was not enough at all, not to cover everything i wanted to, especially when having to consider other people in our party. We did all the touristy stuff, the stuff you cannot come back from New York without being able to say you'd done it.

The first day we walked down Broadway,we visited the ground 0 site, did a boat tour of the coast which covered the Statue of Liberty, the brooklyn bridge and the manhatten skyline. We went to Grenich village which was lovely, got turned away from a number of bars and bought some New York cheesecake.

The second day we went to the Empire State building, up to the 86th floor and admired the view, took a stroll down times square, central park and into the Moma ( as an art student its considered illegal to leave New York without visiting at least one gallery), found The Strand, 18 miles of books, i think we speant at least an hour in there, and then Allabaster Books, which was another amazing bookstore.

I definatley need to go again, at the legal drinking age and for longer, There's so much there to see, gallerys, shops, cafes.

Sad seaside village

Adventures often pop up and suprise you, and often they are the most insightful ones. Last weekend I went on a Norfolk holiday with some friends from uni and we went on a bike ride. On seeing a sign post pointing to Happesborough our quick trip to the village shop for milk, turned into a full blown 5 mile bike ride to the disappearing seaside village. Happesborough is known in England as the village that is quite literally falling into the sea.

One path quite suddenly stops where the road has fallen and all that remains is a jagged cliff edge overlooking the beach. A stairway stands unattached to anything, a temporary structure suspended in time.

Happesborough fasinated me, the beacheds covered in debris, the abandoned houses on the edge of the cliff, the desolate caravan park-one house stood quite stubbornly right next to the drop, the windows replaced by wood having been smashed in by the wind with a handwritten sign reading;
                               "This house is still lived in and will be until the sea gets too close!" 

(i thought the sea was already too close)
All the surrounding houses have already been evacuated and demolished, so this little house stands quite alone. It made me think of the old man in "UP" who refuses to move, and i really hope one day soon balloons with rise from the broken tiling and off it will fly.
It was all quite sad really, but then Happesborough isn't exactly a happy place, the sea is eating it.

The Sea and the maiden

There once was a woman
who was courted by many
but her one love was the sea.
So after turning down the hands of many amiable and handsome,
rich and humble men
she turned her eyes to the sea;

"Oh my love" she whispered
"my love" said she
"why can i find no man like thee,
so vast, so deep, so uncontrollably free
you are the only one for me."

And with her words the waves surged in
wanting her, grasping at her bare feet
but a las this love could never be
for the sea would surely devour her.

So from it's depths sea created a man
to match it in its beauty,
Pearls for his teeth, his hair perfect waves
his eyes the deepest of blues
Yet the man could not speak for the sea has no voice
but still he went ashore.

On seeing her love the woman she cried
tears of perfect happiness
As the one that she loved did ascend from the tides
In all his beauty, his eyes so wise
as the sea has seen many centuries of lives.

So the two of them married
and for many years lived together
happy in eachother arms

but as time went on the sea grew sad
for there were still many adventures to be had
still many boats to sail the oceans
still many creatures to roam the depths.

And so one night when the moon was high
the Sea looked at his wife and bid her goodbye
and with one step he was gone with the tide
leaving the woman with tears in her eyes.

For to her the greatest adventure had been
the love they had shared, the happy times she had seen
so stripping of her clothes she ran into the waves
into her lovers arms to be saved.

The Sea and the maiden
the maiden and the Sea
until the end of days
together will be.

By Roisin Callaghan
(20/05/12)

I spent the weekend in a house by the Norfolk coast, i wrote this on the beach.

Tie-dye Thursday

Today was such a good day. I finally felt productive, getting up and heading straight out to meet some friends in town rather than just sitting round for hours on my laptop. We spent the majority of the day tie-dying which was a lot more challenging than we had originally anticipated, but the results were worth it.
I'm normally quite sceptical when it comes to tie-dye, but i think when you control it yourself there's a new element added to it and it was generally just a really fun way to spend a day.

House

There are so many things to look forward to in my life at the moment, and i dread when all the excitment comes to an end. Luckily for me one of the things i'm excited for lasts two years.
My house next year.

To be completely honest i can't really remember how it looks but my current house isn't hard to beat, with the screaming toilet, cracked ceiling and mould. Of course I'll miss my housemates and our crazy outbursts and random dances in the living room.

But I'm excited to live with four of the friends I've made this year, and all girls so finally decorating the house and making it look lovely is something i can look forward too. I keep seeing things on DIY blogs and in Oh Comely magazine that i cannot wait to try.
We're also going away this week, my new housemates and I to a house in the Norfolk countryside which has got me all excited.

Carla Bruni - Quelqu'un m'a dit

I want to learn French just so i can sing this.

Spring

Tonight walking home i really appreciated the recent downpours. It's a beautiful evening, mild with a breeze, the scent of blossom in the air, the freshness that follows the rain, and while everyone complains now...im sure they cannot help but appreciate the lushous green that now fills each and every garden.

Final hand in for this year is on Monday, and i cannot wait to sit back and enjoy summer. It feels so weird to think it's already been a year, as i grow older the years certainly seem to be getting shorter which means i should really make the most out of them.

I had a lovely weekend just gone. On Saturday i finally managed to drag myself to the Stew Gallery and Norwich's famous flea market which was full of treasures...not that i bought anything, being a poor student and all. A quaint tea stop at Franks Bar and then the artist book fair at the Forum(Norwich library) which just put me in a creative mood, which unfortunatley wore of fairly quickly. But overall it was a lovely day which beautiful company.

                   And this month has so many treats in store;
1. Hand in on Monday which means partying for the rest of the week.
2. I'm spending next weekend in a seaside town in Norfolk with my housemates for next year which will be lovely i'm sure.( hopefully the weather will improve and we will be basking in sunshine)
3. The end of term which means the end of my first year here at NUCA, whether this should be considered a treat i'm unsure. Second year will mean lots more work, and i'm going to miss Norwich over the summer.
4. Seeing my sisters and my mum of to Zambia. I really wish i could go but it clashes with;
5. NEW YORK AND FLORIDA- this is probably going to be the highlight of my year and i cannot wait.

Tom Rosenthal - The Boy

Been quite enjoying this song. I like it because it's a story, the animation is lovely too.

I haven't posted for a while. I've been working on some sound pieces for my group exhibition which has consumed much of my time, that and Easter holiday lazy days.

Here's a little something i painted a few weeks ago for fun.

Point

I attended two performance workshops, one on Friday and one today and I think they were really beneficial, i got so much from them and it's definatley made me more confident on performance as a medium.

As part of the workshop we had to come up with a performance piece to show today. We were given a strategy and material as ideas although we didn't have to follow them, i used my strategy which was "divert attention" I showed this through pointing. I think the whole thing was quite strange, me, standing in a public space, in a zebra mask, pointing...maybe a bit surreal?

I got really good feedback which was awesome. There was definatley an element of fun and a sense of play in the whole idea, and the invited audience really interacted with it which i thought interesting, moving my arm to point in a different direction or standing behind me mimicking my pointing. Even though the mask was purely a way to hide myself, it became the piece and the pointing side of it wasn't as important...especially since i wasn't pointing at anything in particular.

A success? I definatley think so. I'm really happy with the way it turned out, and who knows i may experiment with the idea some more in different locations.

x

The beginning of a fairy tale

This(above) is my view on Mermaids, half woman, half fish...which half?

Laurel sat, her gaze cast outward toward the fading light on the horizon, another night to follow another day. The suns rays grasped the ocean surface clinging on until at long last the worlds orbit pulled her away and darkness swallowed all. Darkness is a funny thing, it gives the illusion that the world has disappeared and you are alone, darkness is witchcraft, darkness is fear, darkness is a curse.

Laurel was cursed. An eternity alone, and why? Mermaids are wicked creatures, throwing aside any mis-conceptions that these fairy-tales brainwash us with. Mermaids are vain beings, and this vanity shrouds any ounce they have of goodness. They lure ships to their doom and why, so that they can see the mens gaze as it falls upon them, the looks of lust and wonder, until they note her lower half...a scaly fish like tail protruding from her torso, and then...horror as her ego is crushed and she watches the mast sink down, pulled down by the current. Laurel was different however, her heart was there.
If one could go back in time there are a number of things they would change I'm sure, and Laurel like many other's had regrets. For example she would not have swam from her wedding day, had she known of the consequences at hand. Laurel was not rich, her father was not a king and if the family hoped to grow wealthy it was down to Laurel to make that happen. But Laurel like all girls longed for true love and Maurice was not a man one could ever fall for. His puke coloured hair and scaly skin, next to those teeth was enough to repulse anyone into refusing him, yet Maurice was rich and powerful and he would ensure the families welfare.

to be continued...

Saying that i'm quite unsure when it'll be continued, or whether it's worth continuing. What do you think?

x

March

It's March...2 months into 2012 so soon, and already finished term 2 of my first year on BA fine art. I hope i don't let this year slip away, but it seems to be. To prevent this from being the case i'm going to make myself a new rule;

Stop thinking about who you want to be and be who you want to be.

I spend way to much time thinking and not doing, ideas await formation in my journals, visions dormant in my mind...i need to resolve this, and hopefully if i keep referring to this rule i will.









x

Assessment all done and handed in. There's that lightness of foot that follows... and so i spent the rest of the day sleeping, because the days before hand in are always exhausting. Bought a new sketchbook so i think i'll have a days rest and than get creative again.

Open Studios

Automatism

"Pure psychic automatism-the dictation of thought in the absence of all control, exercised by reason and outside all moral or aesthetic concerns" Andre Breton, First Surrealist Manifesto, 1924

aim of automatism=to access material from unconscious mind.

I decided to try automatism, automatic drawing i found difficult but when i applied the notion to music it came out with some interesting results.

x

Brother & Bones

A friend linked me this last night, and i absolutley love it.

Picasso

“Everyone wants to understand art. Why don’t we try to understand the song of a bird? Why do we love the night, the flowers, everything around us, without trying to understand them? But in the case of a painting, people think they have to understand. If only they would realize above all that an artist works of necessity, that he himself is only an insignificant part of the world, and that no more importance should be attached to him than to plenty of other things which please us in the world though we can’t explain them; people who try to explain pictures are usually barking up the wrong tree.” Picasso

In every project i approach i seem to take a lot of influence from Picasso. My work isn't necessarily similar in appearance but i find he's concepts/ mixture of style/ imagery and words inspiring. What a beautiful man he was.

x

But baby it's cold outside...

I do quite enjoy the snow, and i was secretly hoping to get stranded in London on Sunday so i could speand some extra time with my best friends, but the cold is something i'd rather avoid. I've got into an awful habit of watching the day pass from behind a window...not that my house is any warmer.
I have done a major clear up today...my room has been a state pretty much since i moved. And then i did some baking...cause that always warms me up, and i like to think my housemates appreciate it too.


Follow the link for my banana loaf recipe

Is this my practice?

I like storytelling

I like surreality

the state of unconciousness withing reality

the being aware of both

forming the superreal

the surreal

"Everything you imagine is real"

I want to make my imaginings a physicality

I want to be able to see it

to touch it

to experience it.

Minotaur

"There was no reason for alarm, she knew as he held her in his arms"




Asterion 1 (biro, watercolour and collage)
x

George Kalukusha-Bottles

Here's the track i did the artwork for-George Kalukusha; Bottles. Love itx

Lucy Chadwick

I rarely find people who seem to be doing what i want to do, and recently i've been unsure of what exactly i'm doing. I know what i want to do and i know what i want to be, the path im taking to get there seems a bit pointless. But Lucy Chadwick is where i want to be and she did the same course (different uni) and she's managed to get her own gallery and live an awesome life...so i think i'm on the right track. Just need to keep at it i guess.

x

Bottles

A friend of mine asked me to produce some artwork for a new single he's releasing next week. The tracks called "Bottles" and George didn't really know what he wanted, i listened through the track a few times and this is what i came up with. Hopefully he's happy with the results.
Heres an interview he did for BBC Introducing;
http://audioboo.fm/boos/614476-george-kalukusha-06-01-12

He's also on youtube and facebook; www.youtube.com/user/georgekalukusha


www.facebook.com/George-Kalukusha-Music

Pigs and wild things

i haven't blogged for a while, partly because i have no idea what i'm blogging about. I'm taking sculpture this term, which is really fun. I get to torment pieces of metal with the plasma cutter and blow torch, drills, rivets, plaster, casting...i can't show any images of what i've made because my camera won't work, i did however manage to snap some pictures of a couple of collage/ sketchbook pieces i've been working on as a basis for my new obsession in mythology and mask making.

I want to explore the themes within mythology, looking at the same time at costume and mask within the realm of the surreal. I want to find the connection between human and play, human and the animal and human and myth...hopefully maybe try out some performance ideas aswell.

I'm in a zone, the wrong zone. The zone where you know you need to be doing something productive with your time but just don't...not that watching an entire series of Pretty Little Liars in the space of 3-4 days isn't productive.


Its a new year and a new term...why can't i motivate!!!